2024-12-22 - You Are My Home Ice

12/22/2024, 11:47pm

To: (Avery)
From: bamaram@warners.fam

Hi Avery,

I'm standing in the rink, and I already know that I fucked up. All I can say is that I realize, and realized quickly, that your comfort and happiness means more to me than mine. And certainly more than me picking on Ari. And you know how much I love picking on Ari.

I think I know what's about to happen. And it's totally justified. I'm not going to deny you your anger, because you deserve to let it out. I'm going to stand there, take it like a man, make no excuses. And suffer the consequences.

But I will promise you already that this is the last time I will play any games with your heart. Mostly because we played a lot of good songs tonight and I never want to have to hear that one. It's not worth the risk, even if I know that our connection is strong enough to withstand my idiocy. It shouldn't have to, and you shouldn't be the one to have to bear the burden of that.

You'll no doubt read this after you have given me a piece of your mind. I kind of hope it's also after our first bout of amazing make-up sex, but I don't deserve that. I'm sure we'll have another chance because I can't promise not to do anything stupid again, but I can promise not to do anything that stupid again.

I love you. You are important to me. And even though my actions didn't show it, you are way more important to me than making Ari uncomfortable and freak out. And again, I stress this, you know how important that is to me.

I hope I am lying next to you when you are reading this. But if not, I deserve it, and I just hope that the next time I see you after you read this, you give me any other punishment you think I still deserve, or give me a way to make it up to you.

Also. I need to clarify one thing, and you're right, this only needs to be said to you.

Yes, the fucking just started a little bit ago.

But loving you? The more I think about the way I felt looking at your smile, hearing your laugh, being next to you while we killed goblins, and yes, watching your ass while you killed goblins, I realized something really important.

The loving you started well before the fucking you did.

And that's why that is the last, the very last time, I will ever use that word about you ever again.

Love,
Alabama

(Attached is a selfie of Bam, his free hand making the ASL gesture for "I love you", with Avery in the background facing away from him, bent over the fog machine at the ice rink.)